I wrote this letter in honor of all the young girls who sadly step into the dieting trap with no end in sight. It is my deepest hope that our generation of women will learn how to end the body battle and empower today’s children to create healthy relationships with food and their bodies.

I will start by telling you a true story…

I was 15 years old in beautiful, sunny Florida on vacation. I remember being out on the town with close family friends. Everyone was eating ice cream except for me. I desperately wanted to eat the ice cream, but I thought I was “too fat” to allow myself to indulge. At this point, I was already a whiz at the dieting game. I had been playing it since I was in middle school.

My friend’s mother who was in her 40s and quite overweight held her ice cream and looked at me with envy. She said to me with a sigh, “Oh Michelle, if only I had your willpower.” I silently wondered to myself how long she had been losing her war with food.

With sad eyes she looked away and devoured her ice cream. I felt guilty that my “willpower” was making her feel worse about herself. I also felt embarrassed that she was praising me for having control around food when in reality I believed food was controlling me. I also knew it was only a matter of time that I would be overcome by the seductive power of my “forbidden foods” and binge like a crazy person. My “willpower” was very fleeting.

I wasn’t sure who was feeling more miserable. My friends’ mother for eating ice cream when she “shouldn’t”, or me for depriving myself of the ice cream because I didn’t think I deserved it. Why did this food have so much power over both of us? Would we always feel this way?

It took me decades to find a way to trust myself around food. Sadly, my friend’s mom still feels trapped. She is in her late 60’s, has been on countless crazy diets, feels like a failure in her body, and unfortunately suffers from health issues caused by her excess weight.

Although our stories and struggles have been very different, we both started out with the same goal. We wanted to be able to stick to our diets and lose weight.

While she continues to look for the “right diet”, I gave up the dieting game years ago. This turning point in my life allowed me to work with my body rather than constantly fighting my body. It is a game anyone can learn if they are open to letting go of the old rules that no longer work and discovering the magic of listening to and making peace with our wise bodies.

Nowadays, if I truly desire ice cream or any other previously forbidden food, I eat it with joy rather than with guilt and shame. Sometimes it still shocks me that I no longer feel compelled to restrict myself around food and easily maintain my ideal weight.

It pains me to see women stuck in the war with food and their body. I know it can become a lifetime battle. With the risk of sounding too dismal, part of the my pain is knowing that many women, including my mom’s friend, will continue to diet and hate their bodies for the rest of their lives.

Don’t let that be you. You have a choice. If you feel like you have tried everything and failed, please reach out for support. It is almost impossible to make these changes without a friend, therapist, or coach who is able to see a higher vision for you.

Please do not give up on you or the children who are looking up to you for guidance. No matter how scary it might be, you can let go of old habits and create a healthier version of you. I believe in you.

With love- Michelle

Contact me at: michelle@michellebailen.com

I have to admit I’ve been delaying in sending this letter to you. My intention was to share my thoughts on the “New Year’s Resolutions”. As the weeks passed, I felt like my inbox was getting bombarded with information about setting goals for the new year. I wanted to share my personal thoughts on this topic and not get lost in others’ opinions.

Although I love the freshness of the new year, I often feel like hibernating rather than hustling in January. My major goal for 2014 is to “be happy.”

I know that might sound boring and Pollyannaish, but the truth is, most of the goals we set have the underlying intention of increasing our happiness.

Think about it. Why do we want to lose weight, get in shape, make more money, improve our relationships, go on more vacations, or find a new job? Because we believe we believe achieving these goals will make us happier.

If you are reading this newsletter then my guess is that you have a desire to lose weight, have more energy and feel great in your body. Whether or not you wrote any official resolutions, I want you to know that there is a way to achieve these goals AND be happy in the process.

The way we have traditionally been taught to approach our goals for weight loss is the exact opposite. We have been sold on the idea that we need to embrace misery and sacrifice in order to get the results we crave.

What sounds better to you?

The traditional dieting approach: ?* Embark on a “battle of the bulge” whereby you believe losing weight will always be hard and you need to “be good”, count calories/points, and spend hours on the boring treadmill. ?* Eat boring “diet” foods while feeling self-righteous and jealous of your friends who are indulging in the foods you love. ?* Feel deprived and wonder how long you have to keep this up until you finally reach your goals.

The Befriend your Body Approach: ?* Create a life long friendship with your body. I will teach you how your body is your wise and collaborative partner in weight loss rather than a “thing” you have to control. ?* Enjoy delicious, healthy foods that boost your energy and mood. Never feel deprived or worried about being perfect. ?* Have fun while you slim down. This is key if you want your weight loss to be sustainable.

It’s your choice. You can always travel the familiar, miserable path of traditional dieting or you can take a risk and walk a different path. I know it can be very scary to try something new and that is why I am here to guide you on that path.

With love- Michelle Bailen

Contact me @ michelle@michellebailen.com

While many people think of summer as the prime season for skin damage thanks to the risk of overexposure in the hot sun, winter can also be brutal for skin. The dry winter air can cause flaking, cracking and itchy skin as well as chapped lips. Even worse, the problem is exacerbated once you step inside a heated area or hot shower, where furnace air or scalding water dries skin out even more. Dry skin can even lead to eczema. It’s easy to take healthy skin for granted, but it doesn’t just happen. Make sure the products you use and the environment you live in are primed to help your skin stay healthy.
To begin, choose a cleanser that will nourish the skin as it cleanses. This means avoiding foaming face washes and alcohol-based toners. Instead, look for antioxidant-rich products that contain ingredients like tocopherol (vitamin E), lipoic acid and CoQ enzymes. Read More

Six helpful coping tips

Everyone’s personal life can get a bit hectic at times. These stressful times can cause headaches, upset stomach, back pain, sleeping disturbances and difficulty concentrating. Stress also makes it harder for your body to defend against illness and can make current health problems worse.
Not only is stress hard on your body, it is also affects your work life and responsibilities. When personal stressors—divorce, death of a family member or friend, money troubles, problems with children or taking care of an elderly relative—affect your personal life, they can have negative effects on your work life, too.
To ensure that your work doesn’t suffer during a time of personal stress, consider the following recommendations. Read More